A week that was:
‘Emergency’ maths support in school. Headteacher asked me if I could help with some teaching. Oh yes, I said ( do I never learn?).

So teaching Monday Tuesday. Tricky situation more of that later.

Wednesday: DG drives us to Heathrow T5. Reminds me of flying out to Toronto. DG is previously clinician now Education events for a certain xyz Ltd. DG and I negotiate bizarre check in clerk. Security causes a kerfuffle : new machine . Stimulators unknown reaction means I refuse scanners and after some discussion end up with DG discretely removing catheters from my bag ‘make up’ and I agreeing to a private search. Tsk. Two security guards to accompany. All it was was a pat down.

Find DG in the ever so nice breakfast bar. Well it would be rude to turn down a well intentioned treat. So Bellini and fruit salad it is. ( low cal!)

Off we go to Scotland. Great company. Great speeches. Wonderful hilarious upgrade to another hotel for a few of us and me. Whoooo.

Laughed like drains as we sipped night cap. A colleague’s hilarious tale of euphemisms developed by her senior. A certain Professor: it’s called the Roast Chicken story.  These Professors we know clearly having a nice time.

Conference next day went well. Every speaker had to get roast chicken in somewhere?

Very funny. Even made it onto Twitter. Even got a fifty shades of mention.

Then it was fly home. Asleep most of way. Friday teaching. Crawl home at lunchtime and cannot move. The week tanked up on adrenalin gent and antibiotics finally caught up with me.

Sitting at GP I pen this note:

I’m at surgery awaiting  top-GP -man summons.

Receptionist in Rottweiler mood. Snapping at anyone who comes near. She’s then running in calling out names in the seating area. No one answers. She runs ( well trots) back importantly. Tannoy not working?
Only one person playing crush candy with mobile loud. All patients giving him daggers. Oops … he’s run outside now.
I’m selected for trainee doctor narrative training. Are you?

We could tell them a few stories to make them shudder.
I went to Scotland and talked to NHS-de-haggis … They laughed a bit at my stories. Biggest laugh was my tale of Professor of Education joining my awareness campaign. She’s invested in the app Mr Squeezy. This has improved her pelvic floor no end. She’s now telling everyone about it. Hurrah. Even better she’s got Mr Squeezy app for her husband. His successful pelvic floor training has had incredible results on his bedroom performance. Too much information