Remember three men in a boat? The start of this the blog, Jerome and all that has happened since ? Walking round the corner from our house a big blue Audi v8 ( is that a thing?) was parked haphazardly across the junction. The driver, black leather clad and beaming was calling me over … “Jacq Jacq” gawd, myopic as I am, it wasn’t until I crossed over that I realised it was non other than that King of all Surgeons Mr Suave himself. He’d stopped to pick up friends and significant other…his partner. Prattling on about his cars and asking how I was – didn’t think I could even start on that conversation in the midst of traffic. Anyhow his guests arrived for their lift. Excellent surgeon as he is, King Suave failed miserably to unlock the passenger doors. You should have seen us… there we all were standing in the road contemplating pushing his friends and significant other through the driver window. No you really couldn’t make it up! 

After the whirlwind of last week. 
Pewking and pooping. Dizzy and faint and trying to get GP or London or getting no-where but an appointment in October. GP now only goes through econsult and does not adhere to the promise of response in 24 hours. Bollocks. Indeed the continual feedback surveys that that generates have received less than polite responses from me.  My efforts to not make a fuss but actually try to get help were but in vain.

In the midst of this, even the dogs were pewking ! I tried to help young x needing to get their Aunt sectioned. As you do. Jacq advice line also got a call from my parents. Dad’s catheter bloody leaking again. 
Son 2 and wife were here having had devastating awful week. Anyone watching me would see I was sitting in or near a bathroom at all times , googling mental health act, fixing catheters, mopping up tears and getting the dogs outside fast. Oh and Daniel needed paracetamol which inevitably he’d lost and I knew only too well where we keep it. 
Out of the blue  Jerome rang. In my dizzy week I’d forgotten I’d despaired of NHS-land and booked an appointment with him. Forgetting all the other stuff going on, he skilfully extracted my symptoms, my frustrations and suggested a 24 hour hospital stay. Zap the bugs get rid of the pewkiness and headaches and pain and and and press pause.

Indeed true to his word he fixed it all. 24 hours. Jerome popping in and out. Nurses whom I’ve known since 2010 ( yes really! Holy guacamole). They even remembered the allergic reactions and made sure they stayed with me through each iv. No panic red buttons / running nurses required this time. The ECG machine was wheeled in for a check up. Of course the implants were interfering with the signal. I turned one off but hadn’t brought all the kit to turn the other one off. You should have seen the poor nurse trying and trying to fix it. Me trying to explain what I thought the problem was. She gave up in the end. The squiggles made no sense. Ah well no doubt heart is ok really.

GP actually rang whilst I was in hospital. Turned out she wasn’t happy with last week’s bloods and thought I needed to be on hospital. No shit Sherlock Tempted to say ‘ you are too late ‘ I passed the phone to one of the nurses who repeated ‘she is in hospital what do we need to know from you?’
She wouldn’t speak to the nurses and insisted I was in Bedford. Nor could she speak to anyone in London. Simply useless. 

Another GP rang today. Did I know I had a UTI. ? Well yes thanks. I’m in hospital actually. Ah yes that’s good she said. In fact offered any help. Too late for now but at least she tried. Having pressed pause I feel better and just hoping this bloody delayed train gets going so that I can get home.