The weekend. The patients carry on being patient whilst the clinicians can forget all about us. Messing up their week. Would get so much more done if the patients were not there.

Just to summarise events. Over half term ie last week. Dipstick told me to talk to CNS about the issue on my back where the leads went in or out. I explained to him. By text. Dip your CNS is away on half term . Presumably he didn’t know his team had half term. Sounds like no one was on duty that week. He explained by text that he was also away. I wonder if anyone else knew that.

He agreed with my suggestion that I continue antibiotics as recommended by GP and if no better go to AandE. Antibiotics for festering wound duly taken. Along with antibiotics for uti. No one interested in the later. No one even asks.

I was in London to see physio ( broken foot) on Tuesday. Physio really worried about my back. I explained. I was made to promise I would go to Aand E. I did.

After sitting on the dirty smelly pavement outside AandE because the security man said no one could sit inside. I was eventually seen. Some doctor looked at my back for a few seconds said it was ‘dressings’ that had made it so sore it was bleeding. and, he admonished. Do not wear chinos. Told me to go home. Once the discharge letter got done ie hours later. I left. Although I have no discharge letter. I guess it is on Eric. I do not use dressings on my back. I usually wear loose fitting trousers at home but as the journey is a fair way tend to wearslightly smarter trousers on the trains to London. I don’t think for one moment my trousers are the cause. Dear reader I even petulantly said should I just wear knickers on the train? That didn’t go down well. She’s mad as hell at me now. I didn’t tell her I don’t wear chinos in bed.I have pjs. But the sheets under my back are bloody and horrible each morning. Extra washing. But no chinos. I should maybe wear chinos to save the daily sheet wash.

CNS sent me an email asking me not to email anyone but her. I understand that need to control but over half term I was not quite sure who to turn to. . CNS also suggested : Are you able to chat on Thursday morning. A video call?Thanks CNS. Email evidence.

Thursday, I dutifully kept near phone all day. But no call no teams invite. But silly me, as CNS explained she didn’t mean Thursday she meant a phone call. not a video. For Friday. Not Thursday but Friday. Oh stupid me of course she did. . She has now rung me today, Friday. Good job I answered. She said she would never have said video call Thursday. Didn’t I know she was very busy in clinic on Thursdays. How on earth would I know? And sorry but I can read her email very clearly. It says THURSDAY and Video.

GP rang me on Thursday night to ask what was going on. I could only say I don’t know. He sent more antibiotics a holding plan. These I have not yet received.

Today CNS explained Medtronic have no understanding of the charging issues. She further explained that Dip suggests a program change.

She explained they normally do a trial. Before the implant. She told me I must have discussed this with Dip. I don’t know anything about why we did or didn’t do a trial. Maybe because there was a bit of a bug going round. Let me think. Erm Covid or some such?. Last year I had NO appointments face to face or virtual with anyone let alone Dip. In fact it was another surgeon who rang me. Said off record. We are not having this conversation but your implant has been listed as straight ahead no trial.

Many years ago a Senior surgeon we call

GOD, did do a trial for my first SNS. GOD and DIP then jointly implanted first SNS. CNS did the programming. As she insisted I did indeed sign consent on the day of my operation at . April 2021. But as ever signing consent on the day is never fully understanding of all the ‘may go wrongs’. Least of all minutes before going under the knife. But yes it neatly puts the blame straight back onto me. Nice one.

CNS says she cannot make appointments but somebody else can. That frankly is bollocks. My daughter makes her own appointments. She says it is something you have to learn to do. . CNS explained I should not arrive early for appointments. Ah so the shenanigans last time was indeed my fault. Everything everything is my fault.

. Rep from SNS supplier will maybe dial in at the next appointment. .
But as CNS explained they’ve never had any issues like this before. Never? Ever?

Erm how new is this device? 3 or 4 been fitted?

Am I in fact just making it all up. It’s all actually shit b making up symptoms to become the patient from hell.

Yes I really did say that.

It did not end well.