A week to go until the operation for a new Sacral Nerve Stimulator. ( SNS) .

This operation is as a result of my old SNS having run the course of its useful life and finally given up the ghost 2 years ago. The plan was to take the old wiring and battery out and replace it with new wires new battery and charger unit. This would be MRI compatible and last 10 years.

At last a date had been found. But with few or no details other than to attend the hospital at 7 am on Friday 9th April.

Last week I was summoned for blood test height and weight by a monosyllaballic nurse who could only stare at his screen. His photocopying skills needed imprving because the long questionaire he gave me was cut short on one side. So the questions were truncated. This was quite fun:

Q1.

you have any long-standing recurrent

fitness
relevant to your ability to perform

recent surgery, injury or any ongoing treatment.

Q2.

……. you have any known allergies to
……

……animals,
….pollen, specific foods

I just put no for everything and ‘please see computerised system’ That is the one I call ERIC.

He measured my height. Which turned out to be 6′ 6″ . That was because my broken foot boot was still on.

Then it was bloods and urine and home again. Not forgetting that I had in fact done bloods and urine at GP home hospital, that very morning. Due to change in medication. What the hell. A trip to London and back just adds to the Covid exposure.

So imagine my surprise to have a preadmission phone call with a very fun nurse today. He started by asking the usual…name date of birth blah blah… he then told me I was scheduled for an angiogram ( ie heart stuff) . Did I know that? Er no. I replied.

So he deleted that on ERIC. Then we got to …can you run 100m ? er no…said I …I have a broken foot at the moment.

Ah he said. That doesn’t fit the drop down menu. I make that a no.

And so it went on until the best bit of all.

He read out the urology procedure event sheet thing.

‘ procedure 1. Friday 9th April IMPLANTATION OF SACRAL NERVE STIMULATOR

Procedure 2. On a later date ( to be arranged) Extraction of Entire SNS unit and tined lead and new microstim medtronic battery (MRI Compatible)

God we laughed and laughed. To think of putting the eye wateringly expensive bloody SNS IN on Friday then taking it all out again sometime later.

He promised to contact someone surgical to find out what he hell was going on.

He promised to find out where I should be and when.

There was no mention of Covid isolation, avoiding public transport to get there etc etc…but I will do that.

Covid test is apparently in the post.

He and I then put the world to rights, not least of all France and their mess up of vaccines. My fellow Yellow Cardie SW is there and had explained the crapness of it all this morning.

So there we are, a weekend of snow to enjoy sat around the fire in the garden! Gawd.

Oh one more thing. The pre-covid bit of blog is now nearly in a sort of shape to be reviewed and published. My editor friend gave me feedback yesterday. My essay writing days never were very good so I reverted to type and got grumpy about doing a re – writing . Great editor and good friend that she is has gently suggested it is tweaks not ditching that is needed. So I will do that over the weekend. Some friends have the copy already. I will act on feedback and not be grumpy! We will check for defamation and grammar and formatting and etc…