Quite a week in NHS Land The launch of the National Bladder and Bowel Project NBBP is generating 100 emails an hour as each stakeholder hits ‘reply all’ yet again.
Having been so brilliantly surgically injected by the Baron my spine has been enjoying some respite care. Pilates and walks and swimming and sleeping again. I’m determined to shed the blobber and get fitter quicker before this stuff wears off.

Meanwhile Dad was admitted to his local hospital for elective day surgery. Got him there for 7am where he joined the dystopian march to separate relatives and carers from patients. Some hours later I collected him with no discharge notes and no clinicians to ask. Consent was even sent the next day…unsigned. Shit.We stumbled through cigarette smokers who were gathered in a now closed car park. Through flooded path and sloping gangway I got him to stumble to my car and took him home.
Later that day I joined the infamous ‘yellow cardies’ on tour. Our mission to support M.J. Who is struggling horribly in NHS land care for her mum. It was a late night as in early morning that we all got home, we hopefully cheered things up . Not least our fiddling with the interior lights on the car we were in. The owner’s knobs we declared , would never be the same again!
A few hours sleep later and it was
Thursday and the funeral of Jackie…in fact also like me, Jacqueline Mary. Goodness the memories of weddings and christenings in that church…all the hopes and fears of all the years. I have to say the lightbulbs do not seem to have been changed in the last 33 years!Many tears. Much emotion. Much awesomeness.
Then after a few hours sleep off to London for the long awaited Nephrology clinic. This hospital is now ‘all computer’ paperless. That means that unless the patient has remembered to print off the PAPER letter . The hospital number cannot be found. It means that whilst called for weight and BP , urine test and height, twice. Which recorded on a scruffy bit of PAPER, The consultant still had no data . In fact he had no data at all. He thought I had two functioning kidneys, a functioning bladder and no allergies. As he yawned a massive, tonsil bearing, yawn, I asked HIM, if he was ok. You look exhausted. I said. So sorry. he said…I was on call yesterday. I took pity on him. Handed him my own notes, history, letters from Jerome, drugs list. Sat staring out the window whilst he read them….zzzz Eventually he woke up. Ordered up bloods, pharmacy and scans…the search engine on the ‘system’ retrieved zero results for urology, zero for continence , zero for uti…at which point he gave up and sent me back to reception. I leant over his sleepy body to retrieve all my papers.
I eventually found blood tests. Really it’s clinic E. Obviously .But you have to register on a hidden screen on a wall. USING YOUR PAPER LETTER. Then sitting on chairs which are no where near the call up screen. Then wait and hope that you might be able to check the airport type screen if you actually sit on the floor somewhere near.
You get the jist. … just when I’m about to burst into tears Jerome rang. He had sent me the msu results at dawn this morning. Suggested the antibiotics. But I’d run out. So, Fighting back the tears I said hello. He said…. Come over to my clinic I’ll do antibiotics for you. Phew…bloody awesome.
at last I could escape clinic E, aka bloods! and walk round to his bit of the hospital. Found him bear hug and all. Laughed and joked. Found his pharmacy. They queried the script. He had written his extension on PAPER for me to show them. But The ‘ system’ was unable to phone him. In sheer frustration I offered my own phone and so they rang him for authorisation….
They asked if I was allergic to anything? No I replied.
Was I on any other medication? No I said.
Good job the ‘system’ couldn’t check that!
So much quicker to just say no. Waiting for the dispensary to dispense I checked 101 NBBP emails and did not reply..at all, let alone reply all!
Retrieving my phone I eventually got the meds and stumbled off home.
Only to discover GP who I’d never heard of was ringing to ask me if I knew I had an infection. Two weeks too late I mumbled and put the phone down.
Home again sorting Dad and National Bladders and Bowels…it’s time for bed..

sa