I keep seeing the same man on trains he’s very nice  I think he’s a friend of D’s but I’m too embarrassed to ask him his name  . D thinks he works at GCHQ . Maybe he wants me to do a secret mission. He’d be surprised if he tried to follow me …..

Way back in 2017!! you may recall I was having trouble with the bladder implant known as ‘SNS’ . After a series of frustrations Dipstick   …tried to reprogram it and then the SNS rep ( Droopy Drawers) cancelled her appointment to try to fix it. Dipstick was going to ‘ write a strongly worded letter to the company’ ( bet he did not). Anyhow I switched SNS off as it appeared to be stimulating my toes rather than bladder. Toes great. Bladder not so great.

After a bit of head scratching managed to get an appointment with the SNS nurse. His name I could not fathom. But it sounds like Bingo. And here I was 3 months later  headed for London once more

En route I’d arranged to collect precious ‘forms’ from Jerome’snewquarters. (JHQ)

Arrived at JHQ….no forms…everyone looked

blankly at me as though I had lapsed into Russian code .

Never mind I burbled….and I wandered off to the next hospital to see Bingo.

By utter awesome bloody brilliance my old friend and original SNS nurse was doing a one off Clinic. Let’s call her, ‘legs eleven’. M@ternity ‘ keeping in touch’ . Wow I said unbelievable luck. She was thorough. She was honest. She knows all the men in my boat. She understands ! Turns out the SNS is not working. ( really Sherlock) ?! The SNS had been mis programmed. And the leads seem to have migrated. To stimulate the S2 nerve. Ie toe curling. Leg banging agony    .

What to do . Better see one of the men in the boat. But which one?

 

As for the forms….well ‘Where’s the forms ‘ is a new take ON Where the hell is the Wally. If I had a GPS tracker it would look something like this….my fitbit ( fitbitch as D calls it) went into overdrive and as I type on my train, it informs me I am an overachiever! Must be the stairs Jerome found

Jerome ended up meeting me, in the street, as you do, finding the forms himself, in JHQ and leaping back to Consultant tasks in his  Hospital, …..if the Russians had been tracking us they’d surely have got confused! Thank goodness for Jerome  .

 

As for Bingo I’ve still no idea who on earth he is. Who cares. Legs Eleven Made in Heaven…. .