BoariJ

Horse’s Arse

Thursday 15th:

Written on a London pavement. So I was sitting on a step. I’d rather have been lying down. Bloggit frrrr.

Phone call Wednesday 14th from surgeon office:

“Can you be here by 10 not 1230 ”

“Sure” I said whilst inwardly swearing ….rush hour train fares, overcrowded early trains overpriced rip off fares at that time of day.

Thursday I got up ‘crack of’ to get everything done. Remembered to reschedule afternoon meeting to be earlier.

Got to clinic on time, despite late running, overcrowded train costing the earth.  Despite an early fall UP home station stairs, coffee splattered everywhere, it stank all day…all the long long day actually, as for injuries …. hip, hand, knee took the brunt of it.

So at clinic I was, told at the desk, ‘Good news’ she said ‘Surgeon is running on time today’ Hurrah…and I was  immediately ushered downstairs.  Wearing invisibility cloak was handy, as I waited patiently at the side, my own surgeon and radiologist were chatting about the merits of schools which were single tier ie no transition or two tier, ie change school at 11 or 12 or 13…fascinating stuff.  Of course I do actually know a bit about that.  But even a teacher becomes ‘just-a-patient’ in such situations.  Anyhow they soon finished and I was scanned by radiologist but surgeon did not seem to see me there.  that invisibility cloak again. Great. It was all going so well. Radiologist did say he thought bladder was not emptying well.  I knew that really. But at least surgeon would know the ‘real’ rubbishness from the report too.

I went back to waiting room.

And I was standing, pacing, moving, stretching, wiggling my back, I  sat a bit in those horribly uncomfortable chairs, in other words I was in the waiting room, waiting AND waiting AND……yes, waiting and waiting and waiting and ….RB-Point up to Left

waiting…I was there  two hours, before I politely asked how long it would be. I was told to allow at least another half hour. So I said I would get a bit of fresh air outside.  So there I was, and I  started to blog to calm down. I also re- re – rescheduled  meeting yet again. Bugger.

I paced the pavement for a bit. Couldn’t stand it inside. So nearly went home.   Bloody hell.

I think I worked out what had happened. My original appointment was 1230 … easier for train etc then. But they must’ve forgotten to book scan. I bet you anything that’s what’s happened. Wish they’d said. I’d have brought a picnic. Wonder if I dared ask for a coffee?

Every patient in the waiting room seemed to be talking on a mobile. Ignoring polite notice not to use phones, they just merrily chatted away.  A bit like on trains. The contracts I must have heard, the confidential legal advice I’ve overheard, its not that I wanted to, the invisibility cloak seems to descend …do they not realise everyone can hear every word?RB-FigonCell

One patient was clearly a surgeon.  He was talking to his patient’s GP about the patient’s name xxx rotator cuff. Sounded like a nice surgical invoice would sort that.  Then he spoke to his secretary about unpaid client accounts, he told her he needed to pay some bills. Then he rang his bank for balances, two accounts; one medico legal, the other was his clinic lp patient account. So the whole waiting room heard his password  ‘horses neck’. Oh and then he rang a travel agent to book his holiday in the Bahamas with his girlfriend , Nikki. So we all clocked his name, surname, her name,  surname and spelling too! Oh and he is to be going on November 9th ( after his half term break…?),  to ‘The Cove’ resort, in E.l.e.u.t.h.e.r.a. He spelt that out too you see. Despite my efforts to ignore him, read my book and cut out his loud strident tones, he just managed to fill the whole room.  Wonder if his wife cares? What a prat.tit.

He got called in…of course, before me. After all HES A DOCTOR Jacq remember you are only-a-patient.  I was at that point standing, reading, over by the door, but of course invisibility cloak on, tsk, as usual.

A French lady on her phone was whispering which was even MORE annoying than talking loudly..

Oh and a Norwegian lady  on phone. I think she was peed off.. from what MJ has taught me of the language. But, that is not an expression to be used at a Urology clinic.  Tak that’s thankyou in Danish,  learnt that from the Bridge !

In the corner was an elderly couple who talked about their taxi journey which they’d planned to take an hour and a half, but in reality had only been half an hour, so they were early, so next time they would book it later, but the traffic was not too bad, so maybe they should book it later or maybe…..argghghghgh so it went on …blah blah at each other so loudly, their  hearing aids must have needed a decibel or twenty changed.

Friggghing Norah.  Losing the plot I found that

outside …the pavement was  nice, quiet even.  Got a few strange looks. Said good morning and swiftly got corrected by a very well dressed charming old lady out for a stroll. ‘Its Good Afternoon ‘ she said. Silly me.

Later on:  realised my phone which was on SILENT was juddering, ..the nice receptionist was ringing…

“he’s ready to see you now”.

I cannot explain the consultation. It did not go well. I did try to explain I’d been there a long time he ignored that…..he tried to explain what drug he wanted me to try. We didn’t really listen to each other. I didn’t ask any of my questions and fought back the tears, angry at myself for allowing the frustrations to get to me. . I didn’t understand a word he said. He said my bladder was draining well. But I tried to explain I did not agree. Neither did radiologist. So he kindly offered to redo scan but that  meant waiting for another radiologist, to arrive for the afternoon clinic.  So I said no thanks.   I’m sure he  thought I was making it up..I couldn’t explain anything. It did seem to be my fault, everything…he’d forgotten about allergies. Ooh no need for the allergy protocol. Urodynamics next. Reaction to last drugs ? he’d forgotten that too …who cares how crap they make you feel just keep taking the medicine. He shoved a box of tissues at me whilst he dictated his letter. Took me back to desk, relieved to have got me swiftly out of his way. Reception lady queried why I’ve been there soooo long. I nodded, bit my lip and said nothing.So she must’ve realised. She couldn’t book urodynamics because the secretary was ‘too busy’ ! I hate urodynamics so much I was actually pleased. She took my msu form/ sample and said the secretary would ring with result. As if. No chance, I knew that was unlikely. ( Past experience )RB-Sadness

I so nearly made it to front door to escape, but lovely brilliant lady on front door reception, (no idea of her name, we always swap a small chat),  she made BIG mistake, by being really, really nice.  That did it. Tears. Offered of a cup of tea. Could’ve done with that earlier. Said No oooo.  More tears. Explained the morning to her. She mentioned she would ask patients not to use phones.  She suggested I write to practice manager. I noted his name.  Of course I won’t.

Finally got away. Trains up the creek. I got home eventually.

POSTSCRIPT:

Practice Manager rang. He could not apologise enough. He offered to check urodynamics, msu.  He suggested I email outstanding questions to surgeon. I said no point. Would not get an answer. He suggested I email them to him and he would ensure I DID get the answers..  Well you will not be surprised that although a secretary rang Friday ( as I write ) with a date for urodynamics + msu result. Of course not heard back about any questions. Nor will I. frrrr what on earth is the point…